Sweet Dreams…Not!
I’m not sure if it’s a result of holiday stress or remodeling anxiety, but I’ve been having strange dreams lately. Not nightmares exactly, but still very unsettling.
I think the whole thing started because our hot water heater is having issues and I haven’t been able to take the long hot showers I’m used to. Which means I’ve had to make allowances in my usual grooming routine. Every day I have to make a choice as to what part of my anatomy gets shaved properly and I’m losing my personal war on excessive body hair.
Okay, maybe it’s not really excessive…but all the same, I don’t like it. I know body hair is normal, but then I never claimed to be normal. I like hair on my head and that’s it. Everything else I like to keep to a bare minimum. Also, I prefer shaving myself so that means I need time in the shower every day for this sometimes delicate procedure.
What this boils down to is, I’m getting furry in certain areas. And it’s starting to bother me. I could take an extra shower just for my shaving needs, but there are just not enough hours in the day for that right now. Darn it.
It was bad enough when I was obsessing about this during my waking hours but now I’m having dreams about it. I have dreams in which no matter how much I shave, it immediately grows back and grows back longer and thicker every time.
I blame that dream on spending way too much time with my mother lately preparing for the holiday season. She always warned me about starting shaving too early when I was a teenager. She was full of dire warnings about just that sort of excessive hair growth happening as a result. To think, I just laughed at her at the time!
The worst dream is the one in which I have grown long streaming pubic hair that can’t be confined by my panties and hangs down my thighs. It’s horrible! I try stuffing it back up inside my panties but every time I get one area under control, more springs out somewhere else. I wake up in a cold sweat and immediately reach for my crotch to make sure this phenomenon hasn’t really happened overnight. I told Dan about that one and he almost fell out of bed laughing at me. Hmph!
My only hope is that we get a new water heater or Santa brings me a new electric shaver. Otherwise, by next week I’ll be dreaming I’m the bride of Sasquatch. Yeah, I know, I have issues.
I wonder if I work this nightmare thing right, if I can get a spanking out of it. Maybe I should suggest that a good nightly spanking might help ward off the bad dreams? Mmmm that sounds kinda nice, now that I think about it. Couldn’t hurt, except in that good way, of course. I’ll let you know how my evil plan suggestion works. *wink*
