{"id":17,"date":"2004-12-12T23:24:47","date_gmt":"2004-12-13T07:24:47","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.spankingbethie.com\/blog\/?p=17"},"modified":"2006-03-28T20:01:44","modified_gmt":"2006-03-29T03:01:44","slug":"mixing-spanking-and-love","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.spankingbethie.com\/blog\/2004\/12\/12\/mixing-spanking-and-love\/","title":{"rendered":"Mixing Spanking and Love"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I&#8217;ve started thinking about this because of some online discussions I&#8217;ve gotten involved in recently.   This is just about how <b>I<\/b> feel about mixing love and spanking and how I got to this point. <\/p>\n<p>For me, it&#8217;s not just about being spanked; it&#8217;s about the whole relationship I&#8217;m in.  It&#8217;s about the man I&#8217;m being spanked by, the way we feel about each other, the security of being with someone who knows what I need, giving myself and my submission to him &#8211; it&#8217;s the whole enchilada.  <\/p>\n<p>Don&#8217;t get me wrong, I enjoy a good spanking, I just like it better when it&#8217;s flavored with love.  It doesn&#8217;t matter if it&#8217;s for play, maintenance, stress-relief, or actual correction as long as the love is there. <\/p>\n<p>When I was younger I was happy engaging in casual spanking and dated as I pleased.  As I became more experienced in life and love, I realized I wanted more.  Being kinky is fun and I learned a lot from the men I was involved with, but it was like I was getting just a taste of what was possible.<\/p>\n<p>I knew what I wanted but I wasn&#8217;t sure such a thing could actually work.  I&#8217;ve always been a modern woman who enjoyed being strong and capable in my day-to-day activities.  I knew some people would think I was betraying feminism by saying I wanted to give a man the upper hand in a relationship.  In my opinion, the freedom to choose my own course is exactly what those who fought for women&#8217;s rights were fighting for.  I knew this wasn&#8217;t going to be easy, but it was what I really wanted for myself.  <\/p>\n<p>I wanted a strong man who could dominate me without suppressing me.  I didn&#8217;t want a bully or an abuser who would ignore my opinions or needs.  It wasn&#8217;t about giving up my identity for someone else&#8217;s.  It was about finding the right person whom I could love and trust enough to give my gift of submission to.  That man would have to earn it though, it wasn&#8217;t going to be easy.  And somewhere in that formula, a large dose of fun and kink had to be mixed in.  I wanted what seemed to be an impossible dream.  <\/p>\n<p>It wasn&#8217;t until I started exploring on the internet that I found people of like mind.  I found people I could discuss this with and I grew more comfortable with my dream.  I knew it wouldn&#8217;t be easy even in that group to find the right one for love, so I just enjoyed myself and waited.<\/p>\n<p>There are lots of spankos out there and I learned a lot.  Some like only fun spankings or only discipline spankings.  Some people have spanking relationships with people who aren&#8217;t their significant other.  Some like light spanking and some like it hard.  There&#8217;s a huge diversity of spankos out there.  I&#8217;m still amazed and interested in how other people interact in this spanko world of ours.  For me, it is to each his own and I&#8217;m happy when they find it.<\/p>\n<p>I know I got lucky when I found Dan.  He&#8217;s the right mix of fun and dominance for me and we&#8217;ve developed a wonderful relationship full of love and kink.  It gets better all the time and we&#8217;re still working on it.  That&#8217;s natural though and I&#8217;m happy for the growth.  Not to mention thankful&#8230;very thankful.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I&#8217;ve started thinking about this because of some online discussions I&#8217;ve gotten involved in recently. This is just about how I feel about mixing love and spanking and how I got to this point. For me, it&#8217;s not just about <span class=\"excerpt-dots\">&hellip;<\/span> <a class=\"more-link\" href=\"http:\/\/www.spankingbethie.com\/blog\/2004\/12\/12\/mixing-spanking-and-love\/\"><span class=\"more-msg\">Continue reading &rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.spankingbethie.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.spankingbethie.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.spankingbethie.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.spankingbethie.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.spankingbethie.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=17"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.spankingbethie.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.spankingbethie.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=17"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.spankingbethie.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=17"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.spankingbethie.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=17"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}