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Spanking Bethie

All about my spankings and my love

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Mixing Spanking and Love

Spanking Bethie Posted by Bethie.

I’ve started thinking about this because of some online discussions I’ve gotten involved in recently. This is just about how I feel about mixing love and spanking and how I got to this point.

For me, it’s not just about being spanked; it’s about the whole relationship I’m in. It’s about the man I’m being spanked by, the way we feel about each other, the security of being with someone who knows what I need, giving myself and my submission to him – it’s the whole enchilada.

Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy a good spanking, I just like it better when it’s flavored with love. It doesn’t matter if it’s for play, maintenance, stress-relief, or actual correction as long as the love is there.

When I was younger I was happy engaging in casual spanking and dated as I pleased. As I became more experienced in life and love, I realized I wanted more. Being kinky is fun and I learned a lot from the men I was involved with, but it was like I was getting just a taste of what was possible.

I knew what I wanted but I wasn’t sure such a thing could actually work. I’ve always been a modern woman who enjoyed being strong and capable in my day-to-day activities. I knew some people would think I was betraying feminism by saying I wanted to give a man the upper hand in a relationship. In my opinion, the freedom to choose my own course is exactly what those who fought for women’s rights were fighting for. I knew this wasn’t going to be easy, but it was what I really wanted for myself.

I wanted a strong man who could dominate me without suppressing me. I didn’t want a bully or an abuser who would ignore my opinions or needs. It wasn’t about giving up my identity for someone else’s. It was about finding the right person whom I could love and trust enough to give my gift of submission to. That man would have to earn it though, it wasn’t going to be easy. And somewhere in that formula, a large dose of fun and kink had to be mixed in. I wanted what seemed to be an impossible dream.

It wasn’t until I started exploring on the internet that I found people of like mind. I found people I could discuss this with and I grew more comfortable with my dream. I knew it wouldn’t be easy even in that group to find the right one for love, so I just enjoyed myself and waited.

There are lots of spankos out there and I learned a lot. Some like only fun spankings or only discipline spankings. Some people have spanking relationships with people who aren’t their significant other. Some like light spanking and some like it hard. There’s a huge diversity of spankos out there. I’m still amazed and interested in how other people interact in this spanko world of ours. For me, it is to each his own and I’m happy when they find it.

I know I got lucky when I found Dan. He’s the right mix of fun and dominance for me and we’ve developed a wonderful relationship full of love and kink. It gets better all the time and we’re still working on it. That’s natural though and I’m happy for the growth. Not to mention thankful…very thankful.

Spanko Chocolates

Spanking Bethie Posted by Bethie.

spanking chocolates

Aren’t these the cutest things? Ms. Margaret Davis has quite a selection of little bottoms to chose from on her site.

I think I need to order an assortment for a certain spanko man I love since he likes bottoms and chocolate so much. 😉

I Got My Football Spanking!

Spanking Bethie Posted by Bethie.

It turned out to be a great weekend. My team won its football game, I got my spanking, and we had some much needed hot sex. In fact, I was almost disappointed the opposing team didn’t score more points than they did…almost.

Like I reported in my earlier post, Dan gives me a swat for every point the opposing team scores to make things a little more interesting for both of us. This time, he chose the big cane, which really got me interested. I’d never spanked with a cane before Dan bought these, so I’m curious and happy for any chance to try them out. Also, since this was going to be just a few strokes and completely for fun, I was looking forward to playing when the game was over.

I had one other reason for looking forward to some action. I’d had a cold most of last week and I was finally feeling better by the weekend. When I’m sick, Dan is especially protective and takes such wonderful care of me, that I feel even more cherished than usual. It makes being sick easier to deal with but it means no spanking or lovemaking until he deems me well enough. Well, once he started teasing me about my football spanking, I knew things were back to normal and I felt even better. I was ready to skip around singing, “I’m gonna get a spanking!” but I thought that might be a smidge over the top even for me.

In fact, I was looking forward to it so much, I almost cheered when the other team scored. Now that would’ve been scary! I’d have had to blame it on the beer I was drinking, I guess.

Dan must have been as anxious as I was to play, because as soon as we got to the bedroom, he sat down, got the CB paddle out, and pulled me over his knee. I went along happily and was soon enjoying a nice stingy spanking from my love. He spanked my entire bottom alternating between hard spanks and light spanks as he warmed me up for what he was calling “my real spanking” with the cane.

Occasionally he’d give me a flurry of really stingy ones that would make me squeal, and then ask me if I was ready for the cane yet. I was enjoying the paddle spanking and still a little nervous about the cane, so it took a while for me to give in and say I was ready. Normally, he’d never let me decide something like that, but I think he was still being considerate because I’d been sick.

Once we agreed it was time, Dan got the cane and directed me into position on the bed. I’ve always been such a spanko that almost every implement fascinates me. I practically salivate when I see a good spanking toy. Okay, maybe salivate isn’t the right word…but there is some dampness involved. *wink*

I’m no different with the cane. I’d heard good and bad things about the cane over time. The reason I wanted to even try it was because so many other subs had said they liked the cane that I figured it must be like a lot of other intense implements; it depended on how hard you like your spankings and if the spanker knew how to use it.

Since I like my spankings intense and I trust Dan’s expertise, I’ve been looking forward to trying these canes out. No matter how crazy that may sound to some, there I was with my butt in the air willing and waiting.

Dan swished the cane around in the air a few times getting me even more excited before lightly tapping the end of the cane on my bottom as he lined it up. I took a deep breath and held it as I waited for the first one to land. I heard the cane swish and then I felt a quick sting followed by a burning sensation across my bottom. I gasped and wiggled my butt trying to shake it off.

Then I felt Dan’s hand on my lower back and I settled down. Dan rubbed my back and asked if I was okay. When I assured him that I was, he continued. Every stroke was a little harder than the last and I tried to relax and let myself just experience the feeling of the strokes. The last one was the hardest by far and I fell forward kicking and squealing.

Dan settled in next to me to admire his work and cuddle me. Soon we were kissing and even though he asked me more than once if I was sure I was up to it, we quickly moved on to better things. It was really good, too! Mmmm it made up for a week of feeling icky that’s for sure! I just wish football season wasn’t almost over.

Football Spanking

Spanking Bethie Posted by Bethie.

I love football and this weekend my favorite team is playing an important game. This means a gathering of friends, lots of food, and a loud but very good time…I hope! I’ll be rooting for my team as loud as anyone. Maybe even louder because I have a lot riding on this game.

You see, Dan has come up with a way to make the games more enjoyable for him. At the beginning of the season, he didn’t have much interest in watching my team play but he was watching along with me anyway. That’s when he came up with the perfect solution to making these games more interesting for him.

For every point that the opposing team makes, I get one swat with the implement of his choice. I’m not sure what his choice is for this game but I’m very interested. Last week it was one of my least favorite implements so I was very vocal when I was cheering for our defense.

If he chooses one of the new canes that just arrived this week, I’m going to be screaming at the television like a maniac if the other team starts scoring much. It might even look odd if it looks like we’ve got the win but I’m still yelling for our team to shut them down. If they only knew! LOL

The upside is, if the other team gets very many points, I’ll have something to blog about. Wish me and my team luck!

Stocking Stuffers For Spankos

Spanking Bethie Posted by Bethie.

At last someone has come to the rescue of all you spankos who want a Cracker Barrel paddle and can’t find one.

Sam commented:

I?ve found what looks like the famous ?BC Tournament Paddleball? at http://www.whatsnextmfg.com/products/bc/Tournament%20paddleball.htm.

*Update* If the link above isn’t working, here’s another one that shows all the paddleballs they have: BC Paddleballs.

It’s the tournament style paddle ball that CB sells in their gift stores and exactly the same one we recently purchased. Of course, being the curious person (brat?) that I am, I looked at the other BC products there and found they offered more than just that one paddle ball style. I kinda like this one because of the flames:

Flame Paddle

They also have one called “Blaster” that looks more like it should be called “Blister” if you ask me. I think I’ll order a couple of different ones so Dan and I can check them out. Then I can to report back and let everyone know how the product testing went. No thanks needed; it’s the least I can do for y’all.

New toys and just in time for the holidays. Thanks Sam! 🙂

Wishing For A New Spanking Toy

Spanking Bethie Posted by Bethie.

I?ve been trying to put together a ?wish list? for Dan so he knows what I want for Christmas. I?ve listed some electronic goodies and jewelry but I?d really like a new spanking toy for us to play with. I just can?t decide which one.

I?ve been trying to pick which of our toys is my favorite so I?d have somewhere to start but I can?t make up my mind. After all, they all have their good points and bad points.

Take the CB paddle Dan recently blogged about. It?s light but still manages to sting like crazy. We’ve had a lot of fun with that toy because he can spank me with it much longer than he can with the nasty, evil bath brush. The sting from the CB paddle is delicious but it doesn?t have the quite the long lasting effects of the bath brush.

This might sound crazy, but I like having a slightly sore bottom the day after a spanking. Every time I sit down I get a nice reminder, which keeps me in a state of constant arousal, and Dan reaps the benefits of that. I have a tough bottom so having me tender means any spanking I get is going to get a reaction and he likes that?not to mention the fact that I?m already horny anyway.

This makes me think a nice paddle somewhere between the CB paddle and the bath brush would be fun. But does such a thing exist? And what about the leather toys I like so much?

The big strap can leave a lasting reminder, the flogger is wonderful because of its varying sting, and the tawse definitely gets my attention but I?m not sure what other leather toy I might like. Decisions, decisions!

Maybe I?ll just go look at some of the online sites and see if anything catches my eye and after that I could go ask Dan to try out a few toys on me to see if that helps. Goodness knows it couldn?t hurt ? except for in that good way I like. Ahhh there is a method to my madness!

A Good Spanking Is Hard To Find

Spanking Bethie Posted by Bethie.

Or a hard spanking is good to find ? whichever you like best! Today I?m feeling very thankful today for my good fortune to have found true spanko love. Not only did a couple of people ask how SpankBoss and I met but I happened to stumble onto a discussion about meeting the right person.

That worked to remind me just how lucky SpankBoss and I are. It didn?t happen overnight and it certainly wasn?t easy finding that one person whose kink matched mine so well. It?s kinda scary thinking how close we came to not meeting at all! Eeek! It makes me want to run into the bedroom and tackle SpankBoss just to make sure this is real.

I?m sure he?d be a little confused though if for no reason, I were to go running in and start climbing him like a monkey up a tree. Not unhappy, but definitely confused. Speaking of confusion and SpankBoss, I can?t keep calling him that here. His name is Dan and that?s what I?m calling him from here on out. Calling him SpankBoss just doesn?t sound right when I?m discussing the intimate details of our life. Hmmm?although when I?m dressed up in that one little outfit it doesn?t seem so wrong?

Okay, back to the subject. Finding kinky love or the kink within your love. It seems a lot of people can?t make those connections. I know there are sites where you can place personal ads looking for someone who enjoys the same kind of fun and games you prefer, but those don?t always work the way they should.

I know about those ads from personal experience. Before I found Dan, I placed a few of those ads hoping to find a spanko man of my own. What I found were a bunch of men who were so proud of their dangly bits that they emailed me large, up-close and personal pictures of their bits.

Every day I would open my email hoping to find that one special reply I was looking for and instead I?d be accosted by dozens of strange penises. Don?t get me wrong, I love a good penis but this wasn?t the way I wanted to find love. I mean, what do you say if you got serious with one of these guys and someone asked you later what first attracted you to this man? ?I loved the way his penis looked from the first email he sent me??I don?t think so. Sorry, but I?m a little strange that way. I need wooing. Or at least a slower pace of seduction.

Now if they?d been at least a little less obvious and showed some style and imagination like a certain Twisted Monk, it might have been different. But these guys just didn?t get it.

They also obviously lacked an ability to read and comprehend because once I got past the pictures and read what they had to say; it made me wonder if I was getting someone else?s mail. I even contacted one site to see if this might actually be true. I sure didn?t remember ever suggesting I might like to have some of the things done to me that these guys were offering to do. Heck, I didn?t even know what some of the things they were suggesting were.

I know some people find love through the ads and I say, more power to them! It just didn?t work for me. That?s why I was hesitant to try any more cyber experiences but that?s about the time I ran across Spanking Classics, a spanking discussion board. I started going there to read the spanking stories but quickly got sucked in by the antics on the role-play threads and the discussions on more serious topics.

I found some kindred spirits there; a couple of girl friends to share dreams with and then a funny guy named SpankBoss came along. We were able to feel each other out through each other?s posts on various subjects and quickly fell into friendly flirting. It wasn?t long before we were sending countless emails every day, which led to long chats every night, and finally phone calls that lasted for hours. I couldn?t believe I could talk that much to anyone! LOL

That?s when we made a leap of faith and I went to visit him. It was like we?d known each other forever and I knew I had fallen in love with Dan. I can?t begin to tell you how wonderful it was to find love with a man who could be romantic and fun while delivering spankings like I?d only dreamed of. I knew he was the only one for me and he felt the same way. It meant I had to turn down a promotion I thought I had wanted and moving halfway across the country, but I haven?t regretted a minute of this. I?m happier now than I?ve ever been because I?m not only well loved but also well spanked.

Okay, now that I?ve gotten all mushy – I guess I will go jump Dan now! I also want to thank everyone for all the positive feedback I?ve been getting. Y?all are great! Now if I can just get my blogroll up, I?ll be in business. I?m just worried I?ll forget someone. If I do, just complain to Dan and maybe I can get a spanking out of it. 😉

My Big Spanking

Spanking Bethie Posted by Bethie.

Even though I have to admit that SpankBoss gave a fairly accurate account of this event, I still want to tell my side of the story.

First of all, I’m not ashamed to say that I really was in need of a good spanking. It’d been a stressful time and I was getting grumpy and feeling out of sorts. When I start feeling this way, I tend to get over-sensitive, weepy, and a little uncommunicative. It didn’t help that SB was feeling stressed as well and he let it show a time or two, which made me feel even worse than before. It was a vicious cycle and the fastest way to end it would have been a good spanking. We’d both get some serious stress relief and be able to fall back into our usual routines again but that just wasn’t possible right then. What was really making me crazy was that he was repeatedly promising me spankings that we both knew he couldn’t deliver anytime soon. The promises worked to calm me down for a short period of time but all too quickly I’d fall back into moodiness again. I was ready to climb the walls in frustration. Believe me, it wasn’t pretty.

Finally the day came that we’d both been waiting for — freedom from relatives and the place to ourselves again! Yay! We started the evening relaxing and settling back into our old routines again. The tension was already easing because I knew what was coming and I was looking forward to what he had promised as my hardest spanking yet.

That may sound a little crazy — looking forward to a hard spanking? But I’d been waiting for this and I knew I needed it to be extra hard in order to get myself back in order. A good spanking can definitely be therapeutic for me and I don’t ever want to be back in the position of not having anyone around who cares enough for me to realize this. Luckily SpankBoss loves me and knows exactly what I need — sometimes even more than I do. I had the feeling this was going to be one of those times and I was looking forward to experiencing this with him yet again.

Being the playful guy that he is, SB started with what he calls “spankmercials” which means every time the TV show we were watching broke for a commercial, he’d pull me over his lap and give me a quick hand spanking. I have no idea what we were watching because I was too distracted by the spreading warmth of my bottom and the yearning inside me that was growing by the second.

I think he knew exactly what he was doing by teasing me and making me wait until the appointed hour. I was beginning to wonder if the stupid show would ever be over and my real spanking would finally begin. By the time he declared the show over and snapped off the TV, I was more than ready — I was on the verge of exploding!

SpankBoss ordered me to strip and kneel on the bed while he got the necessary toys out. I immediately did as I was told and by the time he was ready, I was in place wagging my bottom at him in anticipation.

Here is where we come to a difference of opinion about the implements. He says he started out by “softening” up my bottom with the bath brush. That was no softening up because there’s nothing soft in any way whatsoever about that brush! They weren’t full swinging swats but they were most definitely attention getting. He started out with stingy spanks but worked up to butt burning ones very quickly.

SB also likes to make sure he covers a lot of area so it wasn’t long before I felt like my whole but was on fire. Yeah, I was bouncing around and yelping. There’s nothing quite like a bath brush spanking to get your bottom moving, I can promise you that! Despite the fire moving across my bottom, or rather because of it, I was feeling a deeper and more aching warmth between my legs. I wasn’t sure how much of that bath brush I could take but then again, I didn’t want him to stop.

That’s when he decides to pull out the “bunny paddle” which isn’t as innocent as it sounds. The fur on the fun side is nice and soft but the business side is wide and the wood is thin so it normally just delivers a nice sting, normally. That’s when it isn’t used after getting “softened” up by that nasty, evil bath brush. SB didn’t hold back a bit and was spanking me fast and furiously with that paddle and my poor backside just couldn’t take any more wood. That’s why when he asked if I wanted to change implements I was more than willing.

Oh and for the record, I really did have to go to the bathroom at that moment. The ten strokes from the riding crop stung but didn’t burn like the paddle had so I decided more leather was what I needed. I’m not sure what demon in my over-heated brain took over and suggested the heavy leather strap was a good idea. But that’s what I asked for, and boy oh boy, is that what I got.

From the first stroke of the strap, I let myself go and ride the waves of pain and pleasure. I forgot about everything and all the tension and moodiness I’d been experiencing and trying to suppress finally got to bubble up to the surface. SB helped that feeling along as he swung the strap to remind me of my misdeeds.

I knew something serious was building up but it wasn’t until SB switched back to the bath brush that I was finally able to release it in a flood of tears that surprised me. It was the first time I’d cried during a spanking by him. It wasn’t that I was being punished or pushed beyond my limits, I was crying because I just needed to cry. That’s how it is sometimes with me.

I needed a release and he was giving me that. That spanking was exactly what I needed and wanted so when he stopped to cuddle and soothe me, it made me feel so loved and thankful for this man of mine, that I was able to smile through my tears and settle down. Of course, the promise of the flogger helped, too.

Once I got back into position on the bed, SB began using the flogger. Because my bottom was already tender, it felt incredibly stingy but not too heavy. It immediately put me back into the highly aroused state I’d been in before I’d been taken over by my emotions. I was feeling very much my old self and was happy to make promises to be good and mindful and pretty much anything else my sweetie could desire.

He was swinging that flogger with authority and as much as I wanted to move on to some serious lovemaking, I was really enjoying the intensity of the sting on my throbbing bottom. Not that it matters because it’s up to SB to decide when a spanking is over. When he’d reddened my bottom to his satisfaction, he announced that he was ready to finish my spanking up and that he intended to use the bath brush for the finale.

Huh? The flogger was one thing but that darn bath brush is a completely different thing. If I hadn’t been so aroused and ready for some relief, I might have argued. Besides, I figured as hard as he had spanked me, surely I was a little numb. Yeah, right! I got to find out no matter how warmed up my bottom is, that awful brush hurts like the devil every time. I also think SB gave me four of the hardest swats he could manage.

I didn’t get a chance to complain though because he immediately flipped me over onto my burning backside and began taking me to an amazing climax. There’s nothing that compares with raw animal sex when you have an incredibly tender bottom to heighten the experience.

Yeah, it was a big spanking all right but you won’t be hearing me complain. In fact, I could use one of those fairly regularly. Wow! Did I really say that? *grin*

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